How To Create Better Self-Discipline In 6 Steps
Before I dive into it, building self-control and self-discipline is going to be hard no matter what. By definition, discipline is denying yourself something now in exchange for something later. However, by using this C.R.E.A.T.E. framework, you can build a stronger identity based on self-discipline.
Here is how to do it:
1. Get CLARITY
First, you need to get clarity on the what, why, where, when, and how of what is important to you. Discipline is context-dependent. It doesn’t make sense to take cold showers if your goal is to lose weight. It doesn’t make sense to wake up at 4 AM if your goal is to get better sleep.
2. Practice REGULATION
Second, you need to practice the skill of emotional and physical regulation. When do you usually lose self-discipline? On stressful days, after long weeks… when your mind and emotions are unregulated. Use the right tool for the job: meditate, pray, walk without your phone, spend time with people you care for, watch a funny show, read fiction strictly for enjoyment, or listen to music that makes you feel optimistic.
If that sounds hippie “woo,” then you are exactly the person I’m writing this for. Don’t knock it until you try it.
3. Optimize Your ENVIRONMENT
Third, craft an environment that makes doing the next right thing easier. If your goal is to lose weight, it doesn’t make sense to keep a bag of your favorite chips on the kitchen table. Put it away, or just don’t buy it. More importantly, replace it with a better swap—the only way to break bad habits is to replace them with good ones.
This same logic applies to getting to bed earlier or going to the gym. Set an alarm to remind you when to wind down. Put your gym clothes out the night before. Create an environment that says, “I know who I want to be in the future… and these are the things that future me would do.” Boundaries are only restrictions if you don't have a reason for setting them.
4. Speak AFFIRMATION
Fourth, provide affirmation to yourself. That which is praised gets repeated. Each day or week, reflect on your wins. What are some things you did that moved you closer to the person you wish to be?
5. Identify Your TENDENCIES
Fifth, identify your default habits. What are the behaviors you know you’ll repeat? Where are your trigger environments? In short… who are you? (Not a light question to ask). If you’d like something to get that process going, you can try this short Four Tendencies Quiz created by Gretchen Rubin to help you learn which profile you lean into most.
6. Build EVIDENCE
Lastly, start to build and look for evidence. James Clear talks about the concept of “casting votes toward the person you wish to become” in his book Atomic Habits. This is why I continue to say the phrase “Make the next right choice” in so many of my Instagram videos. Every choice you make is a small vote. The more small votes you cast, the more you sway toward the version of yourself you wish to bring to the world.
Look back at where your life is compared to a few years ago. Maybe you are more aware of what you’re eating, working to break bad habits, getting through school, or pursuing a competitive career. These are all pieces of evidence that prove: “maybe I am capable of this.” Facts trump feelings always. Actions and evidence are more objective and powerful than fleeting motivation.
Give Yourself a Jumpstart
Here are some thought prompts to get the gears turning:
“I know I can accomplish this because I have already…”
“Someone who has already accomplished this goal would…”
“I trust and look up to this person for advice and guidance…”
If you still don't feel 100% confident that you can change, just know that’s completely normal. It’s okay to take imperfect action anyway. Every single person throughout history who is respected for their work, discipline, and drive was actually insecure and unsure of themselves when they started. Act anyway.
Want to build a personalized discipline plan? If you want extra help, support, or direct accountability to put these 6 steps into action, I’d love to guide you through it.
